Neg. thoughts = Neg. Actions but the flip side of that is that positive thoughts= positive actions!

Hi everyone:

So I have not posted in a while, and that is for a couple of different reasons. First off I just did not feel like I had a lot to talk about, I was feeling ashamed of my weight gain, 2 weeks ago I gained 3.8lbs.. That has NEVER happen to me and I felt like a fool. I know that a lot of it was water weight and all but I also know that I did not control my eating, I used my period as an excuse to eat what I wanted, and eat lots of it. That did not help me out at all. I was just in all honesty wanting to eat, I wanted to eat what I wanted and even though I did TRACK I still ate like a monster, well I suffered from that, so that is what I get. 

When I went to WW on that Sat, I did not think that I would be up that much, even though I knew that I would have some gain, so when I saw it I was like what the?! I don't know why I was so shocked, I mean I know that I I ate the food I know that I did not work out so why the hell was I so damned shocked????? IDK! I think it was because I was just breezing through the program I mean I had not had a gain higher then .8lbs I was feeling like I had this all under control, boy was I wrong!

I am happy that I had this happen to me though because it showed me that I am not "in control" of myself at all. I need to watch what I eat and I need to make sure to track all of it and I need to stay within my points and workout.
I have accepted this and I am moving on and I am moving in the direction that will get me to success :)
Weigh in last week was good for both Nikki and me, we are both back on track and I was down 3lbs :) that was what I was up and I plan of reaching my 10% VERY soon. This weekend is the Walk-It Challenge for WW a 5k, I have NEVER done one before but I am going to on Sat. I am nervous and self-doubting, but I have something that is WAY stronger then my own self doubt and that is support, I will make it and I will make it with my P.I.C!
So I will be updating all about it afterwards on Sat.

I will leave ya with some pics: I don't have my weight chart right here but I will tell you that I am at 387.2lbs for a total lost of 36.2 lbs almost there.......................and here is a pic of me and my P.I.C on a bus trip

What a long week!

So I thought I would take a min and post, tomorrow is weigh in and at this point I would rather stab my eyes out then go to weigh in tomorrow. I have not had a good food week at all. I mean I have been being OVER indulgent in my food choices and not thinking twice about it. I have not had one good thing to eat this week. Ugh..........Whatever! I am PISSED at myself I am feeling like a loser and I am wishing I would not have had the food I had this week :I Anyway this is a warning that tomorrow I will NOT have anything good to post. I am sorry for being a fuck up this week, I am sorry to anyone who reads this and feels like I am for whatever crazy reason helping them. I am sorry that I did not care about me enough this week to make good food choices and to workout. BLAH! New week new attitude, I will be better next week.

Until then thanks guys!
fatgirlsaywhat~
V!

I beat you Easter Foods and Candy's I BEAT YOU! HA HA HA HA!

~**Good Morning**~

Hey, 

So yesterday was weigh-in, and I was really nervous because I had eaten good over the holiday and I was eating lots of candy anyway, I was thinking that because I had stop exercising after Tuesday*I did 4 days off 3* I would not loose, I think I was thinking that because of the candy. DANG THAT CANDY! lol!

Anyway, I was happy to see when I got on the scale that I was down 2.8lbs :) I could not believe it! 37lbs gone WOW! I have a hard time believing that I lost it because it has not really felt like work, I mean don't get me wrong, I feel like I sometimes want to eat EVERYTHING, but for the most part it has been very wonderful. I am really proud of myself and I look forward to continued loss. 

I am keeping this short because I am tired but I will add more to it during the week. 
Shout out to Nikki, you go girl!!!!!!!! Staying positive! 

until next time thanks for reading
fatgirlsaywhat~
V!