Week 2 Weigh-In!

~**CoNgRaTuLaTiOnS**~

First off I want to say a HUGE congrats to my P.I.C Nikki :) 3.6 LB. weight loss :) I am soooooo sooooo proud of her! YOU GO GIRL <3 I want to celebrate her victory, she did AWESOME! I love her and she kicked ass :) 

Now on to me:

I am really disappointed in myself, I lost .2lbs and I feel like a real failure. I mean I know that I had a hard week and I know that any loss is better then no loss, I just still feel bad, I am just upset, but at the same time I am getting over it! I did cry *AT THE MEETING* LOSER! But on the way home after talking to Nikki(THANKS) I thought 2 things, one I am not perfect and I am going to have to remember that this a slow process but a good one :) I feel better, I am not 100% but I will do better this week, I know where I went wrong and I will not let that happen this week. I don't even want to spend to much time on feeling bad, I cried over it and I vented like a mad women to Nikki so I feel better, I got an Apple and some Peanut Butter toast and a vanilla smoothie (thanks nik) and I moving one! It is really a NEW DAY* (thats for you nik, i was listening)

Tomorrow is Weigh-In! Week in review :)

So tomorrow me and my P.I.C (Nikki) go to weigh-in, I am looking forward to it, but I am scared also, I am scared of failure, but I am just going to stay positive. Here goes some of my weekly highlights :)

Once upon a time there was two SUPER BEAUTIFUL SAHM's.....................Just kidding here goes what really went on.

Me and Nik, started out our new week on Sat of last week with weight loss and continued beauty *thank god for both*, we were lucky as a son of a gun when we went to Subway to have lunch after weigh-in and were given our food for free :) Nikki, swears that everyone just likes to talk to me................Hmmmmm..............she might be right! lol! Just kidding ;) Anyway, we had a yummy sandwich and because they lady was so awesome I gave her a gift card I had in my purse, now all she has to do is put some money on it! LOL! Really it has money on it for a restaurant :)
Anywho..............Sunday: was good and I planned my menu for the week, I also looked for some workout DVD's I could use because I was planning on working my ass off on Monday ;) The rest of the week was touch and go, I had lot's of victories but some suck ass times too. Here are the suck ass things, I want to end on a high note! Suck-ass #1: MOOSE TRACKS nuff said Suck-ass#2 Chips and Cheese again Nuff said Suck-ass #3 Moose Tracks :) I really sucked with that one! lol :)
VICTORY TIME:
#1.1: I lost 5.2lbs/ Nikki lost too but I won't post her business!

SHIT YEAH!
#1: Stayed in points even with the above mentioned
#2: Went to my homegurl's Nikki's to celebrate MLK day with the kids, made some really yummy English muffin's pizzas, taste good and good for you <3
#3: Kicked Nikki's ass in a couple Scrabble games, now granted she did beat me more but we are talking about MY victory :)
#4: Got in WAY more water then last week.
*********5*************
WORKED OUT 4 DAYS IN A ROW TO BILLY BLANKS JR. I LOVE CARDIOKIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am just doing rest day today my legs hurt ;S Start again tomorrow ;)

So all in all I had a good week, I had some down time but I am over it and that is good, I worked out and really gave it my all and I drank the boring H2O and besides that I made it through another week, and if that ain't enough you guys are still reading my mumbo jumbo so that makes me feel "like I'm the only girl in the world"! LOL! Really it makes me feel good..............So thanks guys.
Until tomorrow~
Fatgirlsaywhat,
~V~

Can I be honest?

I am really sad right now, I am angry and upset and the first thing I want to do is turn to food, I had 2 cups of Moose Tracks and I just want to eat more of it! I am so down right now, why do I always want to eat? WHY? Why can't I want to do something else like read or work out or cry or just who knows.

I really want to drown my emotions in the WHOLE tub of Moose Tracks, I just want to eat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am not going to, I am going to breathe deep, I am going to forgive myself for continuing to hate myself enough to want to fall into the trap and comfort of food I am going to pray, I am going to pray hard for understanding and will power, and I am going to THROW OUT THAT DAMN MOOSE TRACKS! FUCK MOOSE TRACKS :S.............well not fuck them but I am going to put it in the deep freezer, the next time I want to have some I will be walking my fat booty down to the basement and get it!

I am a DEBBIE DOWNER right now! Where the hell is my Nikki! I need some phone time!

Halfway through the week and I'm feelin'...................................GOOD!

Hayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!

So here I am in the middle of the week, I have had 1 bad food day and I am going to let it go, I mean hell I already ate the stupid chips 'n' cheese so I can not take it back.................RIGHT???!! lol! Just kidding I know better.
Anyway I have been spending a lot of time reading what has worked for other people, recipes dos and don't s yada yada, and I have found some good recipes and tips, I love Hungry Girl so much, Kraft and Healthy Living site. I have found so many things that I can make that don't make you feel like you are missing out on anything, I mean just swapping out somethings for others can make a BIG difference :)
Working out:
Working out is really work...........REALLY! lol! But it is a rewarding work the kind were you don't want to kill your boss, well maybe sometimes but not for the most part. I am so PROUD of myself for doing it, but if I am going to be real I have to say that although I am proud of myself I am sad, angry and just disgusted with how I let myself get. I mean I really don't have a excuse for it, I can blame it on so many things, I mean let's think who can I blame..................Well there is......Nah! I know who it is and it is ME! I stopped caring about myself one day, I don't know why, I don't really even know when but I know that it happen. I think about how many times I have been like "I swear I will never weigh over 300lbs" then you know you just keep changing the number because once you get there it is easy to say well at least I am not such and such, I have done that and just from really trying these last couple of weeks and reading and learning I have learned that I just made a shit ton of excuses for my self hatred and excuse eating. I want to be different, I want too not be ashamed of myself, I want to feel confident when I go to my kids school, I don't want other kids too look at me and laugh and I don't want too hide myself from myself, rather I want to take a full body picture and like it maybe even love it, I want to not feel like people are looking at me because I am eating but looking because I am just good looking.............WAIT A MIN I am good looking so I mean GREAT LOOKING! lol. I am just ready for change, I am taking charge of my life and loving myself damn it........."I like me, I really like me" lol! I hope everyone is having a good week!

Thanks for reading
~Fatgirlsaywhat~
V!

Could This Be True?????????????????????

So this morning *day two of working out* I finished and after I thought some un-nice thoughts about Billy Blanks Jr. I sat and had a JUG of water and I actually felt good :) I mean tired and almost like I would faint but I felt good :) This lets me know that tomorrow I just might feel better.......hhhmmmmmmmmmmm.............I might be on to something people! lol! Here's looking forward to a good day ;)

Real Life is sometimes to damn real :(

So,I am having a bad food day for some reason, I just want to eat. I want to have things I should not have and I am not sure why. I feel like I am trying to self sabotage or something. Why would I want to do that? I think about it and then I think the reason why is because I am afraid of success, I am afraid that if I do keep on going and then lose a lot and then gain it back I will look "stupid" this has always been a problem for me, I am always the saver of things for other people, I always want to help others but will do anything I can to not help myself.
I am tired of this circle of same ol same ol. I know I have the smarts to do anything, but sometimes I feel like I have this monkey on my back that is aiming for me to fail! I am going to get over the fact that I had a serving a chip n cheese and realize that I am human and I am not perfect and I am a work in progress.................I am going to make it! I do love myself, I am doing this for myself, I want to be healthy and I want to be here for my kids and for my whole family I want to be who I know I am. I want to live ;)

I worked out!!!!!!!!!!

Good Morning!

So this morning as stated in my goal for the week, I did my 11 mins of cardio. IT KICKED MY ASS! lol!

I was kinda sad to think that I can not stand 10 mins of cardio, but rather then be sad I am just going to keep moving, I will be able to do this with ease one day ;)

Drinking my water,and about to have some cereal!

Late night cravings! HELP!

Alright, so every single night I have to wake up because Ajamien does not sleep through the night and each and every time I want to eat something, I mean I am hungry and I want a snack. UGH! I know Rome was not built in a day but I damn sure wish it was built in 2 weeks ;) lol! I had half a granola bar and that will do! I am going to have to nip this in the bud ASAP

!

I am feeling like freakin Jennifer Hudson...............alright not her but 5.2 lbs baby!

Weigh-in!

I was so nervous about it this whole week, I mean would I loose and weight was all those apples and salads and veggies doing the trick............I was really worried!

Re-Cap:

So on Sunday I made the meal plan and I loved it! It took a long time but it was worth it.
I followed the plan and I am so PROUD of myself and in the process I also found some good recipes. I mean who the hell knew that you could just sub. wheat flour and add Oatmeal and make something taste not only good but fill you up too. I am happy about that, huge fear of feeling hungry all the time.......BTW that so DID NOT happen!
I did manage to get in some water 3 out of the 7 days, next week I swear I am going to get that water in . I did not do any exercise this week because Nikki said that I should not so I can see that the plan really does work............she was RIGHT!
After a great week of new foods and full feelings we get to Saturday and it is time for weigh-in..............I am NERVOUS and so is Nik :) well we are excited nervous. Anyway, we get in and I go to weigh in and I am down.......5.2lbs! SHUT THE FRONT DOOR! The program really works, so now I feel more determined then EVER to see that number go down again. This week I am going to do 10 mins a day of Cardio, I know that does not sound like a lot but I am not a person who just works out so for me it will do plenty. I am looking forward to a great week of TRACKING TRACKING TRACKING and getting in two things will be the goal of this week *SN: last week was to have a no meat day and drink some water. I did both* drink 32oz of water everyday, and get my 10min cardio in as well as continue with my no meat day :) I can do it!

Welcome to Weight Watchers

Today was the first day of the rest of my life! lol! I don't like to say that but really I think this time I will go with it, Uhmmmm.............I might think of something better to say later.

First meeting and weigh-in *YIKES*

So I woke up this morning and I am ready, I am going to go pick up my partner in crime Nikki, so we can make our way to the meeting.
Driving there (To Nikki's) I am really excited, I feel very determined and almost like I am going to poop my pants because I am nervous about it at the same time. Anyway I picked Nik up and we went. I have to say Not bad at all, I also have to say and I don't know how this is going to go over but I am REALLY happy that I am not the fattest girl in the room. I mean sure we are all there for one goal and I am all for it but I really did not want to be the BIGGEST one.

I got weighed in and I did not faint or pass out considering I was kinda aware of the number. I will not post the number just yet but lets just say I am not going to be wearing that two pc anytime soon. ;) So anyway, we sit and listen and right away I am liking what I hear, the program is sounding good and you can still eat and all that so I am in! I did buy the points plus calculator and the complete food guide. I AM READY FREDDY!

So after the meeting I went home and I made a really detailed menu for myself for the whole week, I feel like this is the first step to being successful on the plan wish me luck :)
A couple of pictures of me and Nik! This is our face's at the thought of weigh-ins! lol!

Fat girl say what?!

So hey!
I am starting this blog today, I was inspired by another really GREAT blog, called Bee Fit! She is amazing!

Anyway,
Here I am, fat and about to do something about it. I mean yeah, I could just stay fat because really I am quite AWESOME, but lets be real I am not Super Awesome because I am trapped inside of this SUPER big body. Here is the deal:

In December of 2010, me and my friend Nikki said alright, next year is our year, we are going to go to Weight Watchers and we are going to lose some weight. *SN: Nikki, is not as plump as me so she does not have to work that hard to get to SUPER AWESOME Bitch! lol just kidding she is beautiful* Anyway, so we set the date and that was last Saturday January 8th 2011 and so the journey began.............